I have a lovely 13-year-old student who is much more mature than those years. She is gifted, committed and built to sit on a horse. She has been in a saddle since she was six. To each lesson she brings a mixed bag of anxiety, self doubt, fear of failure and extreme shyness. Her predisposition to anxiety causes relaxation issues and the inability to remain present and Mindful. Her self-doubt results in not trusting her instincts in the moment. Her fear of failure stops her mind, locking it in place when she needs it most. Her shyness makes her not ask questions that will help her become self assured and confident. I delight in teaching her. I know I have the tools to help her discover herself in a way she has never known herself to be. Tools that will not only help her inside the ring, but out in the world as well. If I did not address all these issues, how could I help her achieve her dreams? Don’t we realize that we are not just creating riders but we are helping them become visionaries and trainers too?
In my desire to alter the ever deteriorating state of modern riding, I do not believe that I can leave the welfare of the rider out. If you desire to have riding transformed from a practice of force and cruelty to softness, partnership and connection on a superior level, you must always keep the well being of the horse in the forefront. It is easy then to see that the rider is the key to the kingdom. We can give to those who lost their dreams skills they can bring to their life as well as their riding. In the end, it is we , the instructors and trainers, who must see our students as greater than they see themselves. What is more wonderful than watching someone blossom right before your eyes?
(Next: Beginning Transformation)
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This really resounds with me Susan. I think that when we take the role of instructor, teacher, mentor; that it includes some form of responsibility to those under your impression. I hate to say but there is this kind of outlook that we are no longer personally answerable to our own actions in the society that nurtures us.
What I mean by that is we buy insurance to protect against legal suits – in case of events that could be prevented by reasonable disclosure, informed consent and the acceptance of responsibility in the actions on both sides of the coin. We point fingers and place blame on anyone except ourselves – there is little honesty, honor, sacrifice and respect taught in our culture today.
Kudos to you for having this wonderful young rider under your wing to nurture in her growth as an equestrian. Being outspoken is rewarded today with attention by and large, but there is a quality in shyness that I feel is greatly undervalued. Perhaps it is the similarity that it can share with being humble that causes me to appreciate the quality of shyness…
Thought provoking as usual, thank you. 🙂
I work with physically and mentally challenged individuals in an adaptive riding therapy program. I also teach able-bodied and physically fit individuals. With each rider, the lesson is tailored to the the students ability and designed to challenge their limitations and stretch their self image and beliefs about what they are capable of accomplishing. One of my able bodied students is quite a timid rider. Positive reinforcement and challenging skills “homework” have shown her that when she stretches her limits she is able to literally astound herself with what she is able to do in partnership with her horse. We have a responsibility to help our students be all they can be and imagine what might be. Thank you for the wonderful post Susan .
Thank you Virginia and Erica. With instructors like both of you we can make such a difference to so many people’s lives as well as horse’s quality of life.
Long ago my husband watched a clinic I was riding in. After hours of watching people sweat, groan and cry he said to all of us “This is horrible. Why in God’s name would any of you put yourselves through this? Isn’t working with your horses supposed to be fun and fulfilling?” There was a general silence among everyone. I myself was wondering the same thing. Yet, along the way I got lost. Like so many others. Thank goodness for the both of you. People like me and others might never find their way back.
I’m extremely inspired with your writing talents and also with the format on your blog. Is that this a paid topic or did you modify it your self? Either way stay up the nice high quality writing, it’s uncommon to peer a great weblog like this one today.
Thank you for your compliment. Erica is an published author and I am working on a book about my decline and recovery in the horse world, side by side with my mare Doerte.
We both write here because we are passionate about altering the lives of horses, riders and the state of Modern riding.
I am glad we are doing a good job.
Thank you so much for your words of kindness,
Susan Urbanczyk
I’ve read a couple of your posts, Susan, and can see that you are an inspiring instructor. Having read just a little of what goes on in the “horse world,’ I must say I now especially realize how very lucky I was to have the riding instructor I did. I started riding in my 50’s and was able to do so only for less than two years, because of health issues. But I know that had my instructor, who was not aware of any health issues, been insensitive, incapable of being encouraging and did not possess any number of the qualities that any “true” teacher must possess, I could never have accomplished as much as I did. And thank goodness she did! Riding helped me in so many ways and I look forward to being able to ride again, even if i’m not the most gifted of students.
I must say I’m puzzled by some of the comments made on other posts. For some (absurd?) reason I thought that the “horse world” had made progress. Above, after all, Virginia writes about her teaching children with special needs. I know that the other instructor at the rink where I took lessons went through much special training to work with children with special needs. My daughter teaches children with severe autism and she and the instructor look forward to some sort of arrangement to help these children. And I can’t wait for that to happen!
And may I also applaud you for the rehab you with horses. Come to think of it, the instructors I had did the same! Most of their horses has been mistreated, etc. It was a group effort for us all to cheer on those horses as they grew well enough to where they could again be back again with people who loved them.
Great writing, fantastic attitude! I look forward to reading much, more more! Thank you so very much!
Irene
Irene,
Thank you so much for you kind comments. I am so glad you had a trainer that was so inspirational to you. Doesn’t it mean the world when you get that? Having late stage chronic Lyme myself I know how important it is for someone to understand where I am coming from. I suspect you have much more talent than you give yourself credit for. As soon as you can get back in that saddle. Horses are so healing. You can just walk and breath in that wonderful smell of the outdoors and horse.
I think the horse world has made great progress and also declined horribly. Seems odd that I would say that but on one hand you have people like Erica, Virginia, Renee Porcellini, Craig Stevens, Jean Luc Cornille in the area of Bio-mechanics and more doing amazing work with horses and students that I did not see happening 30 years ago. Yes, there were people like Nuno that were working behind the scenes but even he himself said his work would not be recognized until after his death. So yes there is progress.
Yet, I am ashamed and shocked at the decline at the other end of the spectrum. Horses with so many contraptions on their bodies so they can barely move. Young children with spurs and crops, barely able to negotiate the course they are jumping. Professionals with horses that are more talented than anything we had in the past being asked to do moves and jumps that destroy their bodies and minds. People automatically using crank nosebands with a flash without even understanding how that is counter productive to their horses progress and comfort…The list goes on. When I rode professionally there was not so much at stake. So much money in sponsors and now such fame. Never did we have that. How do you alter a system that is so governed by the money and not the welfare of the horse or rider? It is a tough question.
In one area I don’t see much progress is in our instructors. Not many carry the skills to work with people and their frailties and strengths. There may be great knowledge and technique but not much understanding of the rider. This I feel is a HUGE missing. Something I truly hope to alter.
Again thank you for your kind words.
Susan